Tuesday, April 7, 2009
Dear Dr. Jim
Dr. Jim, I am having lots of problems. I am getting so I can't see to drive anymore. I live alone and just can't make it to the grocery store, especially at night.
Another thing, the neighbors are all depending on me to get their commodities and make trips to store and post office, etc. I am the one with the truck, most of them can't drive or can't afford cars.
One man near me has a three wheel bicycle and he can go downtown for supplies and even eat at the corner deli. I couldn't see to get there.
I don't know what to do, my kids all live miles and miles away. I dearly love to go to church but am afraid to ask someone to come get me.
Whatever you say I think will work. I have read your advice piece here for a long time. Everything you say seems reasonable. That is unless you are joking a little with someone.
Old blind guy, getting blinder, Hank, in Happytown
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Please don't put yourself down anymore. There is a lot of good life in the old stud (I say mare for the women reading this).
You just need to figure it out. I have several suggestions, you could choose. Then I will tell you which I would pick.
1. Go live in an inexpensive but nice and clean assisted living. They are set up just for people with the problems like you have. I would suggest a newer city owned facility. I would recommend Oakland, Nebraska. They may have a waiting list.
2. Eat crow and live with the kiddo. If you have a lot, you could stay here and there with some of them. My Dad wouldn't move to Texas so that was out for us and him. We would have enjoyed his company so much.
3. Check yourself in at a nursing home. That isn't often the best because they are set up to handle more critical needs than what you are experiencing.
4. Go on a cruise and find a nice but lonely lady that you get along with. Spread yourself around, very often one will suggest (in a hinting way) that you move in with each other. She could be your eyes you need. You could be a very nice companion that I'll bet she needs;.
These are the best I can come up with for now. Any of them ought to work, you will have to take some initiative for any of them for starts.
Me, I'd go to a nice affordable assisted living home. Get reports from relatives of people who live there, get your kids or you preacher to help you with this.
You will be independent and well cared for. The man-to-woman ratio is generally about one-to-eight at these.
Let me tell you one thing, those women all cluck after the guys who live there. That is an instinctive trait that women have.
Enjoy your changing life, hang in there, and I hope I have helped you,
Old yes, Hank, you may be an "Old blind guy, getting blinder" but please stop thinking of yourself that way. I don't want you to go pitying yourself. There is enough of that pitying one's self in the world already.
And stop worrying about the neighbors, you will get new friends. Dr. Jim
So, keep on keep'n on, and till then,
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