Wednesday, September 23, 2009

Overeating man can't control his eating or his car


Dear Dr. Jim

I am having trouble with my car. Could it have a mind of its own?

Every time I pass by a MacDonald's it wants to turn in. Several times it has done that on its own, just drove in and parked.

Most of the time this happens I don't know in advance until we are in the lot, parked.

When I do realize in time to avoid that place the steering wheel often pulls beyond my strength. Then, once more I am parked in the lot.

I could drive back out but I just don't have the will power to do that. So I go in and have a couple of cheeseburgers, fries, and a drink. Most times I finish with a hot fudge sundae since they are on the dollar menu right now.

Please help me, Dr. Jim. I am gaining weight. Things are out of control.

Happy Meal Hank in Freesburg, Virginia

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Dear H M Hank

This is one of those rare occasions where I cannot possibly believe what I am reading. A grown man, I assume, taken over by his car. A machine at that. Machines will not rule.

Having said that, most times I would trash a letter like yours.

However I sense a problem here. It is a genuine call for help. Help for an over-eater.

Please do not delay, but call your local OverEaters Anonymous as soon as possible.

Do not pass go but please pass the MacDonald's. I feel you are stopping at other fast foods as well even though your favorite may be MacDonald's.

Please read about Overeaters Anonymous on their Web site (link). When you are ready click on the top in the header, the "find a meeting" button.

I found twelve meeting locations within 25 miles of my home. They were meeting every day of the week! Even Saturday mornings. At the bottom, in red are these words, "You do NOT have to register to ATTEND any OA meeting."

I hope this helps,

Dr. Jim

And please do take advantage of these Overeating Anonymous people!

So, keep on keep'n on, and till then,
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9 comments:

Putz said...

boy can i empahsixze with you man>>>>>i never go into this one shop, but i had some money in my pocket and the money forced me into this ice cream shop so overpriced....praline almond, what a name praline almond, one scoop @#$2.31 cents for one scoop, but what a scoop....i could use half o that i said...>>>>>no you can't get anything smaller, i thought praline almond ummmmmm....now my blood sugar went up and i had to go home and take two of those big HORSE pills for diabetics>>>>>praline alond and the money is what forced me in >>>>not a car

H M Hank said...

Actually, Putz, that does happen to me with those $1.00 hot fudge sundaes. I just can't resist them or the cheeseburgers. Besides the price is right at MacDonalds with their Dollar Menu.
But still the car's behavior is worse for me.
I do appreciate your help here, I will make sure I have enough of my horse pills.

BTW, I have not called or gone to OA yet. I might do that.

Ray said...

Maybe a hobby will rescue you. One that so engrosses you that your wife fusses at you about how much time you are wasting on it.

Because maybe you're turning to food to block pain. A hobby will block pain, too. It's a diversion that takes your mind off things.

And so that maybe you don't waste your life (like your wife and your conscience will accuse you of), you can volunteer to teach it somewhere to little kids.

Melissa B. said...

Your questioner forgot to add the Hot Apple Pie. Fried in the same fat as the French fries, I reckon...

Gel said...

hahahHAHAHAH, So here's one place I go instead of listening to my car, when I have insomnia. However, the junk food at Big Mac's would probably test better (mmmm those french fries), but I wouldn't laugh as hard!

Have a great weekend, Jim.

rhymeswithplague said...

I can empahsixze with Hank too. I'm about forty pounds over my fighting weight but fear I will never regain my girlish figure, I mean, handsome and muscular physique.

Oh, yeah, I need a new prescription for eyeglasses as well.

Does sitting on one's fat behind and thinking of exercise count as a weight-reduction measure? If so, I'm in like Flynn.

Dr.John said...

Why not just tell him to walk. The car is obviously possed by a food demon.

rhymeswithplague said...

I think Dr. John means "possessed" and not "possed." Although he may mean "possed," in which case I have no idea what he is talking about. If he means "possessed," however, let me hasten to add "Obviously! I don't know why I didn't see it from the beginning!"

Melissa B. said...

I think my car and Hank's must be "kissin' cousins." I find my Camry turning toward Starbucks several times a day...